Not Good Enough!
Hi! Welcome to this first video in my next video series which I’m entitling “Mind Games.” The mind game we’re looking at today is the belief that we are not good enough. Right off the bat we know this belief has to come from the mental energy field because it’s a belief about scarcity and scarcity as a concept really only occurs on the mental energy field.
The premise is there’s only so many resources to go around and so we have to figure out who’s going to get them. There’s only enough money or love or jobs for a few people. So those who are “good enough,” we decide, get those resources, and those who are not good enough don’t – or get less resources. The struggle with feeling good enough, and being good enough, is one that is universal to all human beings. That means it doesn’t just occur to a few of us who are insecure. It’s something that everybody has to reconcile at some point in their lives.
The Story of “Good Enough”
That’s because at some point in our lives before the age of seven – and usually much, much earlier – each of us had the first experience of our needs going unmet. Even if we had amazing, supportive parents, life is not perfect. There was some point in our lives where we needed to be comforted or fed or cared for in some way, and either we weren’t cared for or we were cared for insufficiently.
That first time it happens that’s a red flag to the mind. Suddenly we realize it’s possible for us to have a need that goes unmet, which means there’s a danger to our survival. It’s very important that the mind solve the problem of why we didn’t get our needs met. What went wrong?
Survival = Being Good Enough
The mind always comes to the same conclusion at that time of our lives, and that is we were not good enough. It can be interpreted in different ways, such as “I wasn’t smart enough, I wasn’t cute enough, I wasn’t loving enough, I wasn’t strong enough….” The mind will take that understanding and develop patterns in our lives to help us avoid any time in the future having that experience of scarcity, not having our needs met. If you know what you’re looking for the patterns are pretty obvious.
For a person who has the belief “I’m not smart enough,” they are going to spend their lives really committed to getting smart. They’re going to be committed to getting good grades in school, or making certain accomplishments. They may be someone who likes to show off how smart they are, and even gets challenging or defensive if somebody attacks their intelligence. That’s not because they want to be a know-it-all. It’s because the pattern in their mind has connected being smart to surviving. So when someone attacks their intelligence it’s as though they’re physically being threatened with their life.
The same might be true of somebody whose belief is “I’m not kind enough.” That person may spend their lives just pouring themselves out for other, giving and loving other – and even saying “yes” to people who they know they should say “no” to, because that person’s exploitative or abusive in some way. They will say “yes” to that person not because they’re a push-over, but because in their minds being kind is connected to survival. Saying “no” is a danger to their lives.
The Solution is the Problem!
The irony of this pattern, which is designed to keep you from experiencing scarcity, is that the pattern itself is founded on scarcity. Which means that what you’re avoiding you’re also cultivating. You’re trying to be good enough so that you get your needs met, but you keep not getting your needs met which means you’re not good enough. You discover over time that no matter how hard you try you never actually make it. There’s a voice in your head – and you know the voice – that pops up regularly telling you how you are not good enough.
On the mental energy field this is your only option. You either work harder for “good enough,” or you finally agree that you’re not “good enough.” You’re never going to be good enough and you agree that you don’t get your needs met.
The Spiritual Energy Field: The Third Way
Happily for us we are not creatures who exist only on the mental or physical energy fields. We are creatures who are surrounded by a larger spiritual energy field, which is also ours. On the spiritual energy field there is unlimited potential. There are unlimited resources. On the spiritual energy field we are the creators and we are manifesting our lives as we are writing our own story.
The challenge we have is to realize is that what is available to us on the spiritual energy field is blocked to us on the mental energy field as long as we try to be “good enough.” The “good enough” story is not coming from a place of wisdom or of kindness. It is coming from a place of brokenness inside of us, and like anything broken it just needs to be healed so that we can get in touch with the story that we want to write.
If you feel like you’re in that place of trying to be “good enough,” and it’s not working for you because you still don’t seem to be getting your needs met, it’s time to start this conversation with your larger self. So start here! Write a note underneath this video or contact me. You and I will start the strategy of how we’re going to release this old story and get you in touch with your larger energy – so you can start writing the story you want.
I hope to see you next time for our next “Mind Game” which is “Our Past Determines Our Future.” I’ll see you then. Bye!
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